Young PAPYRUS - Prevention of Young Suicide - a national charity in the UK

Bereavement

"I feel so far away . distant from everyone. My granddad died last week . no one seems to understand how I feel. everyone at home is together. talking about it and supporting each other while I'm just stuck . here . all alone, totally out of the loop. I miss him so much ... no one understands how amazing he was. Who do I talk to? Should I go home and be with my family and miss uni or stay here and try and distract myself?"

Losing a family member or close friend is never easy, wherever you are. Some people may find it harder when they lose someone from home whilst they are living away at University because they are in unfamiliar surroundings and also because they may feel that they can't talk about the person with people who knew them.

Feelings of confusion, anger, guilt or numbness are common after finding out that someone you know has died. These are completely normal reactions to death. The important thing is not to cut off the support from those around you, as they will give you help at the times when you need it most.

Keep in touch with your family and friends from home to find out what's going on and talk to them about how you're feeling. At the end of the day they know you best and they're going through the same thing too.

Talk to the friends around you, they may not have known the person who has passed away but they will be willing to listen and to help you get through your loss. Sharing all the happy experiences you have had with this person can help you reflect on the good parts of that person's life.

Effects on work Events like this are bound to affect your work, but don't worry. Your university/college will be very supportive and understanding about what you are going through.

If you do feel that your bereavement is affecting your work then talk about it to your personal tutor or a member of staff that you feel comfortable with. They will take your difficulties into account when dealing with things such as assignments or examinations.

Tutors may be able to help you find someone to talk to if you are feeling really lost and alone. There are counsellors in every University who usually offer drop in sessions. You should be able to find out where they are by looking in your student handbook or on the University website.

Everyone deals with death differently. Just remember, there isn't a right or a wrong way to grieve, you can do it in your own time and in your own way. There are always people there to help you .

Useful links -

Cruse - Cruse Bereavement Care exists to promote the well-being of bereaved people and to enable anyone bereaved by death to understand their grief and cope with their loss.

SOBS - Survivors of Bereavement by Suicide (SOBS) exists to meet the needs and break the isolation of those bereaved by the suicide of a close relative or friend.

















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